Little Johnny - Role call!!

A third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem.

The first kid sat in the first row was a teachers pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan, and when I become a man, I would like to go to Japan if I can, and I think I can."

The next kid was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood up and answered the roll call by stating, "My name is Suzy, and when I become a lady I would like to have a baby ... if I can, and I think I can."

The next on the list was Little Johnny, a smart guy sitting in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a darn about Japan but I would like to help Suzy in her plan if I can ... and I think can!"

100 Floor :)

3 Friends living in a room at 100th floor of the building!

One day LIFT was not working, so they decided to tell a story for time pass. They start to walk in steps!

1st person told an action story up to 50th floor! ...

2nd person told a comedy story up to 99th floor! ...

3rd person told most horror story which had only 1 sentence...! that is "I FORGOT THE ROOM KEY IN CAR"

Calendar of Indian Wife!!

365 nights of a Indian wife...

60 nights periods.

55 nights headache.

50 nights I am tired.

45 nights I am angry.

40 nights I have to get up early.

35 nights its too late now.

30 nights I am not well.

25 nights the kids are awake.

20 nights kal karenge.

Now guess whats left -

Don't open the calculator!!

Wonder drug!!

A man comes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, "Doctor, I have performance problem.

Can you help me?"

"Oh, that's not a problem for us men anymore!" announces a proud physician, "They just came out with this new wonder drug,  that does the trick! You take some pills, and your problems are history."

So the doctor gives the man a prescription and sends him on his merry way.

A couple of months later, the doctor runs into his patient on the street. "Doctor, Doctor!" exclaims the man excitedly, "I've got to thank you! This drug is a miracle! It's wonderful! I've had fourteen times in eight days!"

"Well, I'm glad to hear that" says the pleased physician, "What does your wife think about it?"

"Wife?" asks the man, "I haven't even been home yet!"

BP!!

Did u ever notice:

Everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs & lower body with a "P". Petticoat, pants, panties, pussy....

No wonder men suffer from high BP! 

Over Speeding :)

Judge: Whats the proof that you were not Over speeding?

Man: My Lord, I was going to my in-laws place to bring my wife back.

Judge: Case dismissed.

Wedding Dress :)

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "why is the bride dressed in white?"

"Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explained.

"And today is the happiest day in her life." The child thought about this for a moment.

"So why is the groom wearing black?"

Rejection!!

Teacher: Why does it take a million sperms to fertilize one Egg?

Student: Female Ego

Rejection without Reason

New Tagline!!

The managers of the Kissan Steak sauce company found the new billboard impressive. It showed a husband-type man seated in a restaurant with a large plate of steak and potatoes on the table, and a bottle of Kissan sauce.

The original title for the billboard was planned as "What does she know about your husband that you don't?"

The Board members felt that the ad was too suggestive, so they changed the tagline.

The new tagline was: "He gets it downtown, why not give it to him at home?"

Experiment :)

A druggist told a doctor friend that he has at last discovered one very good use of mother – in – law.

The doctor friend asked what it was?

Druggist replied, "To try newly discovered medicines on them before these are marketed for common human use"