This is Hell!!!!

A guy dies and goes to Hell. When he gets down there its nothing at all like he thought it would be. It's just like the beach... clear blue sky, about 85 degrees, sandy beach and waves as far as the eye can see.

As the guy starts walking along the beach he comes upon an old dude he knows who died a few years back. The old dude is laying on the beach with this super hot little hardbody blonde all wrapped around him, and a large cooler chest of beer at his feet.

The young guy asks in amazement, "This is hell?"

"Yeah," the old dude responds. "Wanna beer?"

"Sure!" the young guy says as he grabs one from the cooler. After turning the can of beer over several times he cries, "Hey, there's no hole in this beer!"

"Yeah," the old dude says mournfully. "There's no hole in this blonde either."

THIS IS HELL!!!

Most popular!!!!

Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts.

Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
The one who can eat the last donut.

Amazing Road Sign Story!!!

A Small Story…

A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her.

The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed.

The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised.
That night, the girl slept peacefully.

But, the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him, the way he had hidden his best marble.

:: Moral of the Story ::

If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given his/her hundred percent…

This is applicable for any relationship like love, employer-employee relationship etc.,

Give your hundred percent to everything you do and sleep peacefully.

You have to be DAD :)

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter.

She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.

'Why?' my daughter asked. 'Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's been, it's dirty, and probably has germs' I replied.

At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, 'Momma, how do you know all this stuff, you are so smart.'

I was thinking quickly. 'All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mom Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mom.' We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information.

'OH...I get it!' she beamed, 'So if you don't pass the test you have to be the dad. '

'Exactly' I replied back with a big smile on my face.

Leave it all to me :)

Robert went to his lawyer and said, 'I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it.'

The lawyer smiled at Robert and replied, 'Not a problem, leave it all to me.'

Robert looked somewhat upset and said, 'Well, I knew you were going to take a big portion, but I would like to leave a little to my family too!'

Fake!!!!

Did you fake it this time, darling?" the man asked after making love  to his wife.
"No, dear," she replied. "This time I really was asleep."

Zen Teaching :)

One fine spring day…a disciple looked at some branches blowing in the wind.

He asked his master…"Master, are the branches moving or is it the wind?"

Not even glancing to where his pupil was pointing…the master smiled and said…

"That which moves is neither the branches nor the wind… "

"It's your heart and mind. "