What is Marketing?!!

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You approach her and say: 'I'm fantastic in bed' - That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends approaches her, points at you and says: 'He's fantastic in bed' - That's Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You approach her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say: 'Hi, I'm fantastic in bed' - That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink. You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say: 'By the way, I'm fantastic in bed' - That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: 'I hear you're fantastic in bed' - That's Brand Recognition.

Stock Show!!

A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls.

They come up to the first bull and his sign stated: "This bull mated 50 times last year."

The wife turns to her husband and says, "He mated 50 times in a year, you could learn from him."

They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: "This bull mated 65 times last year."

The wife turns to her husband and says, "This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, also."

They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: "This bull mated 365 times last year." The wife's mouth drops open and says, "WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY!!! You could really learn from this one."

The man turns to his wife and says, "Go up and inquire if it was 365 times with the same cow."

Honeymooner!!

A guy who is a virgin gets married.

On the honeymoon the guy walks into his hotel room and his wife is naked on the bed.

She asks the man, "Do you know what I want?"

The man says, "I don't know."

The woman spreads her legs and then asks the same question again.

The guy says, "You want the whole bed to yourself. Don't you?"

Photo Pose!!

Typical Honeymoon photo pose: He's on a chair. She is standing. Why typical?
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He is too tired to stand up, she's too sore to sit down!

Small -OL!!

Which three two-letter words denote "small"?? Is it in?

Dance Bars!!

Santa: I don't understand the point of Dance Bars.
Banta: Why?
Santa: If I wanted a woman to take my money & frustrate me, I better stay at home with my wife.

Propose!!

The reason why women will never be the ones to propose is
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As soon as she gets on her knees, the man will start unzipping!